The Emotions of my Life

ndakdka

OBLIVIOUS

She decided not to marry him, and move miles away from home and her baby daughter.

 

ASHAMED

When classmates asked where my daddy was. Or where my mommy was.

 

CONFUSED

When I wondered where and with whom I belong. I was 6.

 

FRUSTRATED

When primary school friends ragged on me for not going on the school tour.

 

RESENTFUL

When I couldn’t.

 

DISHEARTENED

When I couldn’t afford to go to the same high school as my other classmates.

 

SADDENED

When my adopted dad would call me to tell me to come home when I moved away after high school.

 

BITTER

I was 19 and sat on the bed after my adopted dad passed away on a sunny day in January. I didn’t cry immediately, or for what seemed like days.

 

NOSTALGIC

I would go to the cemetery on special days. I would cry.

 

FRUSTRATED

When grown-ups didn’t understand why I would burst into tears as a baby, little girl, teenager, woman.

 

RELIEVED

That I don’t owe anyone an explanation for it.

 

MORTIFIED

When I made a life-changing decision that made everyone happy, but myself.

 

ANNOYED

When, a few months after my daughter was born, I found myself swearing into the receiver of a cellphone, telling someone that they were never there for me while growing up and that its too late.

 

GUILTY

Whenever I do anything without my children.

 

SCARED

That I won’t  be a good enough parent.

 

PATIENT

When my children ask too many silly questions, tell stories with no punch line, want to play never ending games with me.

 

LIVID

When people judge me for how I raise my children.

 

VENGEFUL

When I let them have a piece of my 30 year old mind.

 

SHOCKED

When an old school friend sold out our friendship because of money, and I realised we were never really friends.

 

GRATEFUL

For the family and friends I do have.

 

OBSTINATE

When I decided to create this blog as a way to find people who GOT IT. Who got ME, and this NEED to seek MORE out of life…despite the consequences.

 

DILIGENT

When I continue to blog. And blog. And blog.

 

VALIDATED

When my ideas will hopefully one day be well-received.

 

COURAGEOUS

When I decided to formally retire at the age of 40.

 

EXHILARATED

When I think of all the ideas I have and the possible businesses I can start with them.

 

AMAZED

If my ideas are not well-received – even though it can change people’s lives.

 

DEDICATED

But I will continue to research and read, read, read.

 

INSPIRED

When I started believing I will someday change the world, I knew I wanted to be a full time mom first and foremost without the limitations of a 9-5 job. Simply because I wanted to. And I can.

 

PEACEFUL

Now that I have my blog as an outlet for my buzzing thoughts.

 

INVIGORATED

The day I quit my job and decided to pursue life as an entrepreneur. I didn’t go through with it, though. Cold feet .

 

HAPPY

When I look at my husband and children and I know that no matter what else happens, I wouldn’t change anything about my life.

 

 

*Yesterday, I came across this person on the net. I was enamoured with the content on her website. She’s a very real and authentic blogger that I can relate to. I copied the format on one of her pages and added my own little story to the headings. Check her version out here.*

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